Title: What I Feel Now
Type of Work: poem
Source: CMv1 #29
© Copyright 2002 Lindy
i can't stand the distance between us;
can't wait 'til i'm with you again.
for only you can reach inside me,
take me places i've never been.
i can bear no more to be torn apart;
i can't now and i couldn't then.
when my love was used to hurt me
and my soul locked in its den.
i can't understand how those who say
they love you can hurt you so.
i can't explain just why i stayed
when i had the power to go.
i still don't see from your perspective
exactly what you see,
but i'm learning to see within myself
what you see in me.
inside, i was the mouse who roared
but outside just a mat.
i have new goals to work toward;
i walk on soft paws now, like a cat.
i must to learn to think in new ways;
i have to break the curse.
i must shake from me the old days
and leave behind the worst.
the path i walk now is not with ease
(in fact, it's rather hard)
but i knew it wouldn't be a breeze
and i would not escape unscarred.
but the prize i have awaiting me
when i finally get to the end
is the life i can already see,
and will share with you, my friend.
when i was lost and walking dead,
you saw in me a light.
when i was locked up in my head,
you dared to wage the fight.
you felt that i was worth the time
it'd take you to free my soul;
to touch my life and set me free,
complete me, make me whole.
but what you didn't see,
and what i told you from the start,
was not only would you give to me
but i'd give you back your heart.
and when it finally happened,
the warmth flowed from your soul
from the door within that you didn't know;
and you too were finally whole.
two wandering lost spirits
that finally found the one,
to give them back what only they
alone could have ever done.
(written august 26,2002)